Does this look like someone afraid to say what he truly thinks? Someone who avoids people because he’s afraid of being himself, afraid of having some other kid in class make fun of his habit of going to Christian Union? Does he look like someone who spends too many hours, days, months, years worrying worrying worrying about being brilliant at something? About the reaction?
Does he look like a fellow who tiptoes around others, who wants to fit in? Does he mind too much about his fellow humans’ largely unoriginal thinking? Does he subscribe to a lifestyle of action, creativity and uniqueness or something else? Does he concern himself with regurgitated, conveyer-belt opinions by small-minded, untravelled fools? Does he have any time for those whose energy is collected by destroying the positive intentions of others through ugly criticism and cheap schadenfreude?
The answer will come, friend, not through words. I have hated myself. Now the time begins. You post everything to Pravda because only your friends are part of it anyway, there’s no ballast at this time. You record singing songs, which will sound terrible at first, but then they’ll sound done, which is better than perfect. You’ll sing in public, hunt open mikes, spend less time fiddling with programs. You’ll carve songs from melody and harmony, not from rhythm and repetition. You’ll create something fresh, different and inspiring. You’ll shout it loud on Facebook (don’t be afraid). You’ll make sure people hit the good ones. You’ll collaborate with others more than you work on your own. You’ll take enjoyment in this whole process, for now that you’re at this time of readiness, it’s time to cast off a few more burdens. I no longer expect admonishment for screaming my own name in public.
Some of the catchphrases you have to reprogram:
Nobody is listening
Nothing I do matters
My silly art project