Meltdown today. After a wonderful weekend of relaxing introspection and a long hike with new friend Paul, woke up to an early start on Monday to prepare my lesson. The usual scramble for getting things done before the pointless meeting (not ONE word understood), followed directly by dumbass grade 2s who also don’t want to be there. My schedule says Monday’s the easiest day. My Monday said otherwise. No real preparation, broken technology but mostly just the feeling that I’m now no longer the shiny new teacher, saying hello to 900 people a day is getting irritating. I am not amused by the antics anymore, I feel like there’s a lack of discipline in the class with students always chatting while I’m speaking. It shouldn’t be a bargaining thing. I’m in charge, and I hate it.
So bring on the hate phase. They warned us about this in our training. I am dreading tomorrow’s classes. I don’t think I know what to do, and the week’s just begun. I can’t talk to my co-teachers about it because who the fuck are these people anyway? I haven’t been practicing violin much lately and I just feel like packing it in and drinking myself to sleep, alone, again.
Gchat affection from friend-ish people. Such a passive aggressive loser.